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    three new categoris of music, with examples

    Dad music: Huey Lewis and the News

    Cool uncle music: Elvis Costello

    Creepy uncle music: Girls' Generation, Burzum, Kid Rock, Insane Clown Possee, etc.

    [Brief reflections after the jump.]

    1. Any two of these categories form a sorites series with whole genres in the penumbral regions (old school punk between dad and cool uncle, glam rock between cool and creepy uncle, pop/dance music between creepy uncle and dad).
    2. Members of all three categories can listen to classic rock. This is why it is classic.
    3. Anyone reading this who thinks he or she is the cool uncle is almost certainly in reality a dad or a creepy uncle. (A) Philosophy isn't cool, so whaddaya doing here? (B) Relatedly, cool uncles are just too busy doing their cool stuff to engage in much self-reflection on whether they are really dads or creepy.
    4. Creepy uncles have a wider array of contemporary genres from which to chose (e.g. K-Pop, nearly every subcategory of metal (Norwegian death, pirate, folk, etc.), and rap-rock). They form a growing demographic in twenty-first century post-capitalism, one that marketers are finally waking up to.
    5. If you have to be cool, being a cool uncles is the way to go. Since they are not pathologically self-obsessed, cool uncles are much less intolerable than hipsters, and in fact deserve none of the derision thrown the hipster's way. Plus, if one includes the penumbral regions, you get to listen to pretty good music.
    6. I'm sorry that the categories are gendered. Are there seperate categories of mom music, cool aunt music, and creepy aunt music? Or do the original categories cover both men and women and as a result we should try to convince people to rename them? Some third option? I don't know.
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    14 responses to “three new categoris of music, with examples”

    1. Dave Maier Avatar
      Dave Maier

      I just read a new biography of Beethoven and man, that guy was the creepy uncle from hell. But does that make his music creepy uncle music?

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    2. Robin James (@doctaj) Avatar
      Robin James (@doctaj)

      This article by musicologist Susan Cook might help you with point #6.
      http://www.tcnj.edu/~library/e-reserve/heisler/HEISLER-HON370-RESPECT.pdf

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    3. Jon Cogburn Avatar
      Jon Cogburn

      I just started reading Beverly Clearly to my kids at night and we’re at the point in the first book where Beezus’ Aunt Beatrice is about to come over. If I remember right from reading them when I was a kid, she was the definition of the cool Aunt. I wish I could check out her record collection.
      Creepy Aunt just isn’t in the vernacular in the same way creepy uncle is. There are probably pretty sound reasons for this, and thus I’m not at all sure there is a homologous female gendered version of the above typology.
      I hope that that’s all that’s going on. However, there really is something to Cook’s claim about the privileging of rock by critics being implicitly masculinist. This being said, I wish she had analyzed female rock music divinities (the Janises (Martin and Joplin), Suzy Quatro, Carol King, Stevie Nicks, Joan Jett, the members of the Red Aunts, Courtney Love, Queen Adreena, P.J. Harvey, Fiona Apple, Holly Golightly, Lady Gaga, etc. etc. etc.).
      I’m kind of terrified that someone is going to analyze these musicians in the same manner as Carol Glover analyses the “final girl” from horror movies, as really being men in drag. Recent feminist scholarship is pretty critical of Glover though, so maybe rock is safe after all.

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    4. jm Avatar
      jm

      If creepy uncle’s the one with the wicked metal collection then he’s by far the best.

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    5. r Avatar
      r

      I suspect that ‘creepy uncle’ rather than ‘creepy aunt’ exists as a category partially because uncles were more likely to sleaze on their nieces. I definitely have female friends that talk about that one uncle who would make them sit on his lap (with that being exactly as gross as it sounds).
      I’m sad you think Huey Lewis is dad music. While it’s true that their early work was a little too new wave for my taste, when Sports came out in 83 I think they really came into their own–commercially and artistically. The whole album has a clear crisp sound and a new sheen of consummate professionalism that really gives the songs a big boost. He’s been compared to Elvis Costello, but I think Huey has a far more bitter, cynical sense of humor. In 87, Huey released this–4–their most accomplished album. I think their undisputed masterpiece is ‘Hip to Be Square.’ A song so catchy most people probably don’t listen to the lyrics, but they should! Because it’s not just about the pleasures of conformity and the importance of trends. It’s also a personal statement about the band itself.
      HEY PAUL–AAAAAAAAAAA!

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    6. Jon Cogburn Avatar
      Jon Cogburn

      Well, there are certainly levels of creepiness. I do wonder if the creepy uncles who do things like obsessively collect Manga or spend all their free time painting little lead figures from various roll playing games are almost always just weird in harmless ways. Other creepy uncles are just Dads who get validation by kids thinking they are cool. At some points the screw turns and the kids realize how desperately uncool the person is, and an element of creepiness begins to wax.*
      As with bands and genres of music, people reside for large portions of their lives in penumbral regions.
      Boo Radley might have in fact been a creepy uncle (Truman Capote swore that he was a real person who used to put things in trees in his yard that the kids would later get). I don’t know. He does save Scout’s life in the end though.**
      But you’re probably right that there wouldn’t be a category of “creepy uncle” if not for the fact that some men are so irredeemably and destructively horrible.
      re: Dad rock- Anyone who can write melodies as insanely catchy as Huey Lewis and the News and perform them so tightly enters the rock and roll pantheon in my book (though be warned: (1) I am a Dad, and (2) I also routinely listen to other Dad rock bands such as Cat Stevens, Elton John, Billy Joel, Abba, Men at Work, and Adam Ant). I was very much heart-warmed by the outtakes of the episode of Anthony Bourdain’s No Reservations where the guest was Ramones drummer Marky Ramone. Bourdain did his whole loudest-drunk-at-the-bar schtick about how omni-present Billy Joel was in his New Jersey youth and how the Ramones saved civilization.
      Marky thanked him but then proceeded to wax enthusiastically about what a great songwriters Billy Joel and the members of Abba were. It was hilarious and great.
      But yeah, Huey Lewis and the News are great (1980s omnipresence notwithstanding). I shouldn’t be embarrassed to type that.
      [*The aging male academic lothario is, in fact, often if not usually just this kind of creepy uncle. That is, if every male academic had to take some kind of oath to the effect that they are not cool uncles, and that they are in fact dads, I think a lot of misery would be resolved.
      **Tiny world. Harper Lee’s niece taught my high school government class.]

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    7. Jon Cogburn Avatar
      Jon Cogburn

      I think I probably miswrote and that metal proper is also in the penumbral region between Dad rock and creepy uncle rock, with stalwarts like Iron Maiden (“Cry for the Indians!”) firmly in Dad rock and Norwegian Black Metal (Mayhem, Burzum, etc.) firmly in the category of creepy uncle.
      Metallica is now classic rock, so everyone gets to enjoy them.

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    8. jm Avatar
      jm

      Black metal doesn’t feel like that to me. I adore black metal so I’m inclined to stick up for it, but being a fan also means that I’m close enough to see the variety of personalities who listen to black metal. Stereotypes at their expense don’t make a lot of sense, even as jokes. That’s true of all music, of course, but I’m happy to let Huey Lewis fans stick up for themselves.
      Burzum is a special case – there are arguable moral risks involved in being a Burzum fan. But that’s an issue that metal fans discuss constantly. I like John Darnielle’s take: http://johndarnielle.tumblr.com/post/66090751697/but-whats-wrong-with-being-willing-to-separate-an

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    9. Tom Mulherin Avatar
      Tom Mulherin

      Although he may be sincere, r is having a little fun here: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0144084/quotes (search for Huey).

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    10. Jon Cogburn Avatar
      Jon Cogburn

      Ha! I totally forgot about that.
      I thought the Paul thing was some strange Huey Lewis and the News thing. . . I guess it is, but just not in the way I imagined.

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    11. Jon Cogburn Avatar
      Jon Cogburn

      Norwegian Death Metal is interesting in all sorts of ways.
      I find Burzum absolutely terrifying, but I don’t know how much of that is from the music itself or from the history. I think it’s actually pretty great aesthetically, which just makes it all the more terrifying to me. The whole thing has scared me off Death metal. Any links you have to useful stuff to read on the genre would be greatly appreciated.

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    12. Dustin Avatar
      Dustin

      Jon,
      From a creepy uncle to a dad, the very fact that you know Burzum makes you a little cooler than you might otherwise be comfortable with. As for reading, the classic work on the Norwegian BM underground is Moynihan’s “Lords of Chaos”. A more recent, one-sitting-readable piece is Justin E.H. Smith’s excellent article “Ragnarok on the Seine”. And for those who don’t feel like reading at all, compare and contrast two stylistically paradigmatic Burzum songs off (IMO the best Burzum album) “Philosophem”: (1) Jesu’ Tod (raw, necro, kvlt), and (2) Rundgang um die Tranzendental Singularität (slow, soothing, ambient).
      Just don’t put us metal/HC/grind fans in the same league as Kid Rock, and we won’t make fun of your dad jeans, deal?
      Grind yr mind,
      – Dustin

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    13. Jon Cogburn Avatar
      Jon Cogburn

      Ha! An excellent deal.
      Thanks for the citations.

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    14. Sean McAleer Avatar
      Sean McAleer

      Does giving a neice or nephew Uncle Tupelo qualify for some special meta-cool uncle?
      Re Huey & Elvis: it’s interesting that The News was more or less the backing band on “My Aim Is True.” What a difference the frontman makes. (And what a difference The Attractions made;; the Thomases, for my money, are one of the best rhythm sections of that era, and Steve Nieve is in a class of his own.)

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